Tool of the Year Contender Number Four – Judge David Farrell

Have you ever sat there and wondered why Britain is going right down the shitter? You know, those moments where you sit there and think why the fuck have they done that? Normally we reserve such derision for politicians, but occasionally we get other people joining in with this specialised wanker brigade.

Enter Judge David Farrell, a person who we would look to in order to jail criminals and keep our streets safe. Now, you would generally class a rapist as a criminal, even more so if it’s two and they have raped an eleven year old girl. To understand what this judge has done, let’s look at the facts.

Consensual sex is when (usually) two people agree to have sex.

Rape is when one person does not consent to sex, in other words unwilling to participate in the act of sex.

There is no way in hell that the two cannot be mixed. It is either one or the other.

However, Judge Dickhead has a new take on this. He sentenced the two men to prison for rape, yet said the girl was willing. How the fuck is that possible?

If they raped her, she wasn’t willing. If she was willing, she wasn’t raped. Which one was it?

But there’s more. The judge also claims that the girl looked older than she was. Well that’s as good a reason as any to rape someone, isn’t it? “Hi, how old are you?” “I’m fourteen, why?” “Because you look older and according to Judge Farrell, I can have sex with you if you look older than your true age.”

The two men who raped their ‘willing’ victim have received sentences of forty months each. With good behaviour, they’ll be out by next Christmas. Surely there is something we can do about this. There must be some sort of appeal that the family can make, or a petition that can get going to extend the terms for these monsters who have destroyed this girl’s life.

And while we’re at it, let’s get a petition going to remove Judge David ‘Dickhead’ Farrell from his position. People like him continue to give this country a bad name. There are probably thousands of people that have studied and worked hard and could do his job much better than him. I think it’s time to re-evaluate our justice system.

My thoughts are with the victim and her family on this matter. They have been through hell over the last year and thanks to Farrell, their hell is to continue.

David Farrell, I do not even consider you worthy enough to use the initials awarded to you. You a just as much of a lowlife scumbag as the two monsters who violated this girl and, personally, I think you’re an early favourite for Tool of the Year.

I have a feeling you’ll be hearing from me in December.

Jedi Master Bob