Are You Against Democracy? Then Move To North Korea

Do you hate democracy? Are you fed up of being given a free vote at elections? Are you one of those people that will protest just because the result of an election hasn’t gone your way? If so, then a move to North Korea may be for you.
The communist state borders its free neighbour South Korea, so you easily look over the border and take the piss of those who like to have a choice. I mean, who wants to have a choice these days? North Korea is ruled by Kim Jong-Un, who gained power when his father died, making it the most undemocratic country in the world, and executes members of his own family. Doesn’t this sound like paradise?

North Korea is a land of non-opportunity, with a government that allows its people to live in poverty while it spends all its money developing nuclear weapons and making regular threats about going to war with South Korea, USA and anybody else it feels like fighting with.

But if it’s democracy you are worried about, fear not. North Korea has a backward voting system, allowing for just one candidate on the ballot paper which, as you may have guessed belongs to Kim Jong-Un’s party. Voting is compulsory in North Korea, meaning the result is always known before counting has taken place and if you moan about it, the chances are you will be shot at dawn.

North Korea’s immigration policy is very simple, so ask yourself, do you fit any of the following criteria:

Have you moaned about an election result that you didn’t agree with?

Have you protested about a democratic vote?

Did you vote for Clinton and are still crying about it?

Did you want to remain in the EU when the majority wanted out and cried, whinged and moaned about it?

Did you not bother to get your arse off the settee and vote thinking ‘it’ll be alright’ then moaned afterwards about the result?

If you answered yes to any of the above, then you are a complete fuckwit that needs to grow up. You cannot accept a democracy and therefore need to fuck off to a country that will take away your rights and tell you what to do or else they will shoot you. Quite frankly, it’s the least you deserve.

So if you are completely against democracy and democratically elected leaders, then North Korea is for you, so what are you waiting for? Join people like Gina Miller, Tim Farron, Tony Blair and Eddie Izzard and book your flights to North Korea today. Seriously, just fuck off and leave or shut the hell up and accept the results like adults.

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